The Leadership Compass
The leadership compass is based on the work of the famous American psychologist Timothy Leary. He discovered during his research that patterns in behaviour are predictable. People always react to one another whether this is conscious or unconscious.
Everything we do is behaviour; even not reacting is a form of behaviour. The model takes the view that your own behaviour triggers behaviour of the other person. In other words: action and reaction, cause and effect, sending and receiving.
It shows us:
- Which type of behaviour triggers which type of behaviour
- How to influence behaviour.
The model has 2 axes:
- Active – passive (influence and dominance dimension)
- We – I (having an eye for others interest vs only defending own interest).
Every person incorporates the behaviour mapped in the compass and will show this behaviour in specific situations. Every person also has a preferred pattern of behaviour. It is important to emphasise that none of the behaviour visualised is good or bad behaviour. It all depends on the particular situation which behaviour will be most effective for the outcome of the interaction that is taking place.
The Laws
There is a relation between ‘we, I, active, passive’ behaviour:
- We – behaviour from one person is answered by We-behaviour from the other person
- I – behaviour is answered by I-behaviour
- Active behaviour is answered by passive behaviour
- Passive behaviour is answered by active behaviour.
These laws of behaviour can be used when analyzing behavioural patterns between people. You can simply ask yourself two questions:
1. Is this WE or I-behaviour?
2. Is this active or passive behaviour?
‘Placing’ someone’s behaviour is important in better understanding the other person. Furthermore, it gives you insights in how you can influence the behaviour of that person. You can consciously show certain behaviour yourself or adapt your own behaviour to the behaviour of the other person.
Why would you trouble yourself assessing the other person’s behaviour and showing or adjusting your own? The most important reason is that it will assist you in having a more effective outcome of the interaction. More effective meaning achieving your objectives while continuing to keep a good relationship with the other person. Another advantage of assessing the other person’s behaviour and adjusting yours is preventing an automatic reaction.
Through life we all develop automatic patterns of behaviour: a standard way of reacting to others in certain situations. This automatic reaction is not always the most beneficial reaction for that particular situation. Therefore being conscious about your own behaviour and that of the other person can result in more effective interaction.
Explanation of The Leadership Compass
The vertical axe represents to which extent we are more/ less active while interacting with another person(s). Active meaning both verbally and non-verbally showing yourself: speaking, moving around, having eye contact, making gestures, speaking with emphasis, being independent, and influencing the other. Passive behaviour is characterized by being silent, nodding, avoiding eye contact, be polite, humming, conforming, and being more dependent.
The horizontal axe represents the closeness in relationship people have with each other. We-behaviour focuses on wanting to work together, helpful to others, and emphasizing mutual interests. I-behaviour focuses on own interests, fighting for these interests with for example arguments, and being critical.
Description of The Eight Positions
“I Want” > Giving Instructions
Typical behaviour
- Directing, initiative
- Organize
- Define the rules
- Giving instructions
- Assign tasks
- Define working method
- Evaluate contribution
Relational message
- I am strong, confident, powerful, skilled
- I can give good advice, give instructions, taking the lead, taking decisions
Reaction to
- Respect
- Obedience
- Dependence (I follow)
“Let’s / I Propose” > Convincing / Helping
Typical behaviour
- Giving advice
- Encourage
- Mediate
- Reward
- Help out
- Showing sympathy
- Showing understanding
- Convince
- Being available
Relational message
- I am a skilled and understanding person who you can lean on for understanding, emotional support and contiguity.
Reaction to
- Leaning on
- Sympathy
- Demanding
- Accepting
- Looking up to
- Affection
- Collaboration
“I Think Along” > Active Collaboration
Typical behaviour
- Agreeing
- Collaborate
- Condone
- Lean on
- Obliterate oneself
- Avoiding conflicts
Relational message
- I am a friendly, pleasant, non-threatening person and I want you to like me
Reaction to
- Friendly and supportive Convincing encouraging behaviour (let’s / I propose)
“I Follow / Tell Me” > Being Dependent
Typical behaviour
- Being obedient
- Taking no initiative
- Asking for help, guidance and approval of others
- Imitate
- Insecure presence
Relational message
- I am weak, needy and I need your support
Reaction to
- Giving advice, help and guidance. Giving directions (I want)
“I Retreat: Go Ahead / I Quit” > Indifference / Being Inferior
Typical behaviour
- Being reserved
- Being withdrawn
- Being quiet
- Being absent, deviate
- Apologize
- Dissatisfied with oneself
- Paralyzed by own deficit
Relational message
- I doubt myself, I am worth nothing, I feel worthless
Reaction to
- Rejection
- Annoyance: ‘do something!’
- Denial, overlook
- Not interested
“I’ve Got My Own Opinion” > Sceptical and/or Suspicious
Typical behaviour
- Passive
- Dissatisfied, irritated
- Protesting
- Cynical remarks
- Sceptical, doubting
- Complaining
- Building subgroups
- Sabotage
- Asking difficult questions
Relational message
- I do not trust you. You do not deserve my attention, appreciation nor affection.
Reaction to
- Punishing, sometimes rejecting (‘I don’t agree’, sometimes ‘you or me’)
“I Don’t Agree” > Assertive to Aggressive, Confronting, Critical
Typical behaviour
- Criticize
- Disagree with…
- Claim
- Putting boundaries
- Stand up for yourself
- Punishing
- Hostile, attacking
Relational message
- I won’t make it easy for you / I am threatening
Reaction to
- Reaction of fear, anxiety, guilt to the positions ‘I quit’, ‘If have my own opinion’ of “you or me”)
“It’s You or Me” > Competitive Behaviour
Typical behaviour
- Dwell on
- Independent
- Confident
- Dominant
- Condescending towards others
- Boasting
- Keeping initiative
Relational message
- I can handle it perfectly myself, I rely on myself and do not need others
Reaction to
- Rebellious, suspicious (‘I have my own opinion’) withdraw (‘I retreat’)
- Withdraw (‘I retreat’)
How To Influence Behaviour
Activate
Your verbal behaviour
- What do you propose?
- What is your view of the situation?
- I value your opinion.
- I am a bit lost; what do you think of this situation?
- What is according to you the main issue in this discussion?
- Can you give an example from your experience?
Your non-verbal behaviour
- Say little
- Pause
- Be silent
- Not asking too many questions at the same time
- Relaxed body posture
- Inviting attitude by smiling
- Short sentences
Dectivate
Your verbal behaviour
Deactivate on the I-side:
- I want this because….
- These are the objectives because…
- Please stop giving even more arguments.
- What you say is not correct.
- These are the criteria because…
- It is logical to do it this way.
- No discussion is possible.
Deactivate on the WE-side:
- Communicate in terms of figures, facts and examples
- Investigate if you share the same goal?
- If you do, don’t get fixated on a black/white discussion about a solution but look for the interest behind the different solutions and see if you can find a win/win after listening to the other ask if you can make proposition.
- Wait for him/her to say yes.
- Make a proposition which take into account some of the interests of the other
Your non-verbal behaviour
Deactivate on the I-side:
- Speak loud
- Use lot of emphasis when speaking
- Make yourself bigger in your posture
- Strong eye contact
- Sit with your arms on the table
- Stand up
- Be physically close to the other person
- More hand gestures to emphasize
Deactivate on the WE-side:
- Speak in a clear voice but neutral, don’t be angry or irritated. But state in a clear and loud enough way what you want to say.
Towards WE
Your verbal behaviour
- I understand you consider the situation to be… shall we…?
- Shall we think of a solution together?
- I would like to work together with you.
- Shall we discuss the situation so we can agree on the starting point?
- I am sorry that you feel that way.
- I have a problem and ask for your advice.
- I do not understand, can you further explain?
Your non-verbal behaviour
- Speak in a soft voice
- Relaxed body posture
- Open arms and hands
- Short sentences, let the other speak
- Smile
- Be not too close physically to the other person
- While sitting lean to the other person to show interest
Towards I
Your verbal behaviour
- I do not agree with you.
- I interrupt you because…
- Again I emphasize that we have to take this decision because of…
- I am not interested in your point of view.
- Why do we continue discussing while it is clear what to do?
- I can decide for us all.
Your non-verbal behaviour
- Speak louder
- Look away
- Strong arm and hand movements
- Sit back in your chair
- Crossed arms
- Stern facial expression
- Frown a lot